Meals are a daily job, and a dining table that does not fit her chair turns each one into a struggle. The fix is usually not a new table. It is a few measurements taken with her actually seated, then a test before you move the table or order a replacement.

Local option: New Plan Care gives families in the St. Louis area in-home help so a parent can stay home: companionship, help with bathing and dressing, meals, and overnight care. Call (314) 405-0887.

Measure her seat as she really sits

Sit her in her chair, with the cushion she uses, and measure from the floor to the top of the seat. Then measure from the floor to the top of her armrests if she uses them. Her seat height is the starting point for every other number. Write both down and keep them on the inside of a kitchen cabinet door, so the measurement travels with the house conversation.

Measure the table top and the clearance under it

Measure the height of the table top from the floor. Then measure the gap between the underside of the table and the top of her thighs when she is seated. Her knees, the footrests, and the wheel frames all need room under the table edge. If the gap is too small, she will sit at the edge and lean, which makes meals tiring and can make her less steady when she reaches. Check the space under the table from the side as well as from the front, since the legs and the apron can block her wheels even when the front looks clear.

Check the reach from her seat

With her seated at the table, place her cup, her plate, and a napkin where she would normally eat. Ask her to reach for each one. Watch whether she has to lean forward past her balance, or whether her hand can reach without her shoulders rising. If she is stretching, the table is too far out, or the items are placed too far back. Move the items toward her before you change the table, because a simple move of the plate can solve more than a new size would.

Check the path behind her chair

When you pull her in, you need room behind the chair to turn, and you need room for yourself beside her. Measure the space between the back of her chair and the nearest wall or cabinet when she is pulled to the table. Look at the path from the doorway to the table, too. If the chair cannot turn in the space or you have to squeeze past the counter, the table is in the wrong spot, even if its height is right.

Test the setup before you keep it

Set her at the table for two or three ordinary meals before you decide. Watch her get in, eat, and get out. Watch for knees catching the table, wheels catching the floor edge, and any time you have to reposition her chair during a meal. Write down what you saw. If the table needs to change, you now have the four numbers to bring to a furniture store or to a helper who can measure.

When a new table is the answer

If the top is too high and the knee room is too small, a new table may be the answer, and it should be measured against her seated numbers, not the standard table size listed on a tag. Ask for the seat height and top height in writing before you buy, and bring her measurements with you. Do not assume a table that looks lower will fit her, because the apron and legs often decide the knee room.

Her Dinner Table Is the Wrong Height for Her Chair. Measure Knee Room, Top Height, and Reach First.