Most clothes are cut for a body that reaches, bends, and stands evenly. When your wife has one weak arm, a stiff hip, or a foot that does not lift cleanly, the same size from the rack can bind at one spot and hang loose at another. The fix is a measuring session at home, not a new wardrobe. Plan on about an hour, with her seated where she normally dresses.

Local option: New Plan Care gives families in the St. Louis area in-home help so a parent can stay home: companionship, help with bathing and dressing, meals, and overnight care. Call (314) 405-0887.

Measure the arm she actually uses

Have her sit in the chair she dresses in, with the weak arm resting the way it rests when she is being dressed. Measure the upper arm at its widest point, the forearm at its widest point, and the wrist. Then measure around the armpit with the elbow bent, because that is the number that decides whether a sleeve will go on without a fight. Add a finger's width of room to the armpit number. Write all four numbers on the back of the day sheet so they travel with you when you shop or ask for help.

Check the opening, not just the size

A size can be right and the garment still wrong. Look at how the shirt closes. A front opening, a full zip, or a wide back opening lets you dress the weak side first and the strong side last, which is usually the easier order. Check whether the back closes with snaps or buttons she can reach from the seat, or whether it needs two hands behind her. Lay the shirt flat, then hold it to her measurements. If the front opening does not reach the shoulder on the weak side, it will fight you every morning.

Size the pants for the waist and the leg

Weight and swelling change from week to week, so the waist you measured last month may be off now. Check whether the waistband has an elastic or drawstring back that adjusts without a belt. Look at the leg opening next. If she wears a brace, a compression stocking, or a dressing on that leg, measure the opening with that layer in place, not the bare leg. Ask her therapist which pant style they see working for transfers, since the therapist has watched her move and you have not.

Size the shoe with the brace on

Measure both feet at the end of the day, when swelling is usually highest, and buy to the larger foot. Width matters as much as length. A shoe that is long enough but too narrow will press the toes and the side of the foot. Choose a closure she can reach from a seated position, such as a wide hook-and-loop strap, and check that the heel stays put when she stands. If she wears a brace on that foot, put the brace inside the shoe before you judge the fit. A shoe that fits with no brace may not fit with one.

Test it before you buy more

Have her try the garment while seated, then time the whole routine: getting the arm in, closing the back, and getting the shoe on. If it takes longer than it did with the old clothes, or if she winces at the same point each time, the size or the opening is wrong. Keep the tags, the receipt, and the return window open until the test passes. Mark the date you expect to recheck the measurements, because the numbers will change again.

Where the help comes from

A therapist or an occupational therapist can watch her dress and tell you which opening and which closure work for her body. For local people who can sit with you on this, see Local Help for Husband Caregivers. If you are not sure where to start with the rest of the house, the reading order lays out the next steps in sequence.

The Sleeve Has to Clear the Weak Arm: Size the Opening, the Back Closure, and the Shoe for a Body That Changed